Vladimir Guerrero, 2011 Bowman #167

Yesterday the Baseball Hall of Fame announced its four newest inductees, as they revealed the results of the BBWAA ballot. Kudos are in order for one-time Orioles Vladimir Guerrero and Jim Thome, as well as Chipper Jones and Trevor Hoffman.

Vlad was certainly running on fumes by the time he arrived in Baltimore as a 36-year-old DH, and his 2011 season in Baltimore was pretty forgettable for team and player. But he still played in 145 games and rapped out a .290 average. He also eked out the last 13 of his 449 career home runs. I'm a little disappointed that he's chosen to wear an Angels cap on his plaque instead of the Expos, but I guess he enjoyed his time in Anaheim.

Jim Thome was an incredibly fun player to watch, a big, strapping guy with an aw-shucks demeanor who just hit the bejeezus out of the ball. When the O's acquired him for the second half of the 2012 season, it made a magical season that much more entertaining. It's a shame that a herniated disk limited him to 28 games as an Oriole (plus four postseason contests), but even at 41 he still held his own with a batting line of .257/.348/.396 in that limited stint. Like Guerrero, Thome ended his career in Charm City, mashing three taters to wind up with a total of 612, good for eighth all-time.

As for the other ex-O's on the 2018 ballot:

-Mike Mussina was frustratingly passed over again, but got closer than ever in his fifth year of eligibility. At 63.5% of the vote (up from 51.8% in 2017), he is on track to make it to that 75% cutoff in a year or two.

-Curt Schilling is farther off the pace, coming in at 51.2% in year six. If he ever stopped sharing his repugnant opinions, he might do a bit better.

-Sammy Sosa is barely hanging on, garnering just 33 votes on the 417 ballots cast. At 7.8% in his sixth try, he is in danger of falling below the 5% cutoff to remain on the ballot.

-Sadly, there were four one-and-done guys with Baltimore ties: Jamie Moyer, receiving ten votes (2.4%), didn't get much credit for his remarkable longevity and late-career renaissance. Also receiving a mere ten votes was Johan Santana, whose 2014 comeback bid with the Birds was snuffed out by an Achilles tear in rehab. Lastly, Kevin Millwood (4-16 for the 2011 O's) and Aubrey Huff (2008 Most Valuable Oriole and 2017 Least Valuable Tweeter) were both shut out completely. Such is baseball, such is life.

Vladimir Guerrero, 2012 Topps #119

When I first came across this card, I did a double take. I've repressed a fair amount of Orioles baseball from the Crap Years (1998-2011), but I was still pretty sure that Vlad Guerrero didn't shamble his way to a third-place finish in the American League batting race in 2011. Then I realized that this was a career leader board, and it made more sense. Vladi batted .313 in eight seasons in the junior circuit with the Angels, Rangers, and O's, and honestly his .290 average in 145 games in his lone season in Baltimore was better than I figured. But his .416 slugging percentage was by far a career low, which helps explain why that season turned out to be his last. Amusingly, the expanded list of active AL batting average leaders on the back of the card shows Guerrero and Derek Jeter tied at .313, and I'm shocked that Topps missed out on a chance to shoehorn Jeter onto another card. Maybe they went down to a fourth decimal place and Vladimir beat out Jeets fair and square.

Joe Mauer, whose .323 career average through 2011 has dipped to .313 after a couple of down years by his standards, finds his Twins trailing the Birds 4-2 after seven and a half innings tonight. It would be great to shut down Minnesota in two straight games after getting swept in the seven-game season series last year, so let's get those last three outs.

Vladimir Guerrero, 2012 Topps #424

If you want to put the Orioles' amazing 2014 season in perspective, take a look at the box score from the O's-Angels game of September 18, 2011 - three years ago today. The Birds fell to 62-89 with an 11-2 loss to the Halos. Rookie Matt Angle, who hasn't sniffed the big leagues since, batted leadoff. Vlad Guerrero, who seemed like he was 36 years old going on 50, was the cleanup hitter. He actually drove in both Baltimore runs with the final triple and home run of his career. Josh Bell, the failed third base prospect, was in the six-hole. He's playing in South Korea now. The bottom third of the order was no masterpiece, either: Robert Andino at second base, rookie Kyle Hudson in left field, and catcher Craig Tatum. This was a team playing out the string, with six players in the lineup who are no longer major leaguers (some of whom really weren't even then). Then there were the motley half-dozen pitchers who came and went in that game: starter Alfredo Simon and relievers Brad Bergesen, Zach Phillips, Jason Berken, JoJo Reyes, and Jeremy Accardo. Only Simon is still playing in MLB, having had a surprising resurgence in Cincinnati. Paid attendance was 27,471 at Camden Yards, and I'm sure the actual number of butts in the seats was many fewer than that.

From 62-89 to 92-60 in three years. It'll make you shake your head.

Vladimir Guerrero, 2011 Topps Diamond Duos #DD-23

These Diamond Duos cards aren't bad by recent Topps insert standards. Some of them fall flat for me - matching Brooks Robinson with Ryan Zimmerman is borderline blasphemy - but when they hit on a good match, it works. Here you've got Big Papi and Vlad, a pair of American League East designated hitters from the Dominican Republic who have a shared legacy of beating the ever-loving snot out of the ball. Of course, Guerrero was just about cooked by the time he landed in Baltimore in 2011. I was surprised to learn that Vlad is just nine months older than Ortiz, who still seems to have something left in the tank. If I believed in jinxes, I'd start talking up Papi's chances of bouncing back from injury in 2013 and leading the Red Sox out of the cellar...but that's not my style. No sir.

Vladimir Guerrero, 2011 Topps Lineage #41

This is obviously a posed picture. For accuracy's sake, I wish Vlad Guerrero had posed as if he were swinging at an ankles-high pitch.

Vladimir Guerrero, 2011 Topps Update Series #US200

Everyone and his or her cross-eyed grandma is making predictions this week, I figured I’d give in to peer pressure. But let’s be honest: I’m no insider, and I don’t have any uber-advanced data-driven projection systems. Most predictions are guaranteed to be wrong. Knowing, as G.I. Joe once said, is half the battle. So I’m going to be bold and forecast one thing that is definitely NOT going to happen for each Major League Baseball team in 2012. Today, the American League. Tomorrow, the National League. Laugh along!

Baltimore Orioles: In a controversial move, the club celebrates the Autumnal Equinox by burning the Oriole Bird at the stake. It remains to be seen whether the baseball gods will reward this sacrifice with a winning season in 2013.

Boston Red Sox: Fighting again for a wild-card berth on the last day, the Sox name 53-year-old Oil Can Boyd as their starting pitcher for Game 162.

New York Yankees: The team retires Karim Garcia’s uniform number on Old-Timers Day.

Tampa Bay Rays: Joe Maddon protests a blown call by hurling a bottle of fine wine onto the field.

Toronto Blue Jays: Embarrassed by the good fortune of Jose Bautista’s sudden leap forward into stardom, the club trades him back to the Pirates for future considerations.

Chicago White Sox: Robin Ventura is named Manager of the Year after sparking the team’s successful playoff push by moving designated hitter Adam Dunn to shortstop.

Cleveland Indians: A new round of performance-enhancing hysteria is touched off by the debut of the Tribe’s new center fielder, Cybernetic Grady Sizemore.

Detroit Tigers: Justin Verlander shocks the baseball world by striking out 636 batters, shattering Nolan Ryan’s post-1901 record. He is quoted as saying, “I had no choice. Did you see the defense they put behind me?”.

Kansas City Royals: Growing impatient with the progress of their rebuilding efforts, K.C. brass tips the competitive balance in their favor at the All-Star Game by locking all of the American and National League stars in the clubhouses at Kauffman Stadium.

Minnesota Twins: Looking to protect their considerable investment in the fragile Joe Mauer, the Twins take the unusual step of benching him for the whole season. “Better safe than sorry,” says manager Ron Gardenhire.

“Los Angeles” Angels: Free-agent bust Albert Pujols is benched in early June after batting just .157 with a pair of home runs in his first two months in the American League. His replacement at first base is Vladimir Guerrero, who returned to the team as a pinch hitter in mid-May and hit home runs in each of his first eight at-bats off of the bench. Before Vlad can make his first start at his new position, he is attacked in the locker room by a furious Pujols. The Halos suspend Albert indefinitely.

Oakland Athletics: A’s ownership finally gives up their star-crossed efforts to move to San Jose, opting instead to relocate to an aircraft carrier in the Pacific Ocean. Attendance increases by 50%.

Seattle Mariners: The Mariners’ offensive struggles become so severe that the team petitions Commissioner Bud Selig to outlaw overhand pitches. He announces the formation of a blue-ribbon committee to explore the possibilities.

Texas Rangers: Local TV ratings for game broadcasts plummet when the introduction of the Nolan Ryan Cam proves to be a flop. It turns out that no one wants to stare at the team president’s leathery mug for three hours at a time.

Vladimir Guerrero, 2011 Topps Attax #NNO

I don't play Topps Attax myself, mostly because the substitution of the letter "x" for "-cks" offends my English major sensibilities. But if you can read the small print on Vladimir Guerrero's Attax (ugh) card, you'll see that he gives his card player a perk: if you are losing, his doubles turn into home runs. Clearly the folks at Topps didn't see Vlad play in Baltimore. The aging designated hitter slugged just 13 home runs in 2011, his lowest output since he hit 11 in 90 games as a rookie in 1997. Of those 13 homers, a whopping 3 either tied the game or gave the Orioles the lead. That's just what you want from a cleanup hitter, right?

Vladimir Guerrero, 2011 Topps Gypsy Queen #36

In short, today's trip to the Philly card show was a rousing success. I spent every last dollar that I walked in with, and not a penny more. I spent a few bucks on this year's Orioles cards, including those mind-blowingly awesome Diamond parallels from the Topps flagship set. Among my O's purchases was the card you see above, which allows me to properly pay tribute to Vlad Guerrero on the day that he ties Julio Franco for the most career hits by a Dominican-born player with his 2,586th base knock. He might not be able to hit for much power any more, but that takes nothing away from his remarkable career. I also gobbled up a bunch of 1970s commons from a dealer with a dime box, knocking some 1972 Topps set needs in the process. Another table had 1950s cards at a deep discount, so I tackled some of my 1959 Topps needs for a buck a piece and also laid my hands on a few beautiful 1953 Topps for three to five dollars each. On my way out I also relieved a dealer of a wax box of 1992 Topps for $11, because I'm hoping to finally put that set to bed and I always like to have some packs to rip. I was in and out in three hours with the help of my sister, who surprised me by agreeing to come along. She was a big help in searching boxes for specific cards and keeping tabs on my want lists while I hunted. (Full disclosure: for her invaluable assistance, she was rewarded with a post-show trip to the King of Prussia Mall. That place is so huge and sprawling, I'm surprised we found our way out.)

Now comes the fun part: taking inventory of my new cards and storing them in their binders. No sarcasm intended; I really do like this stuff. You may have noticed.