Mike Hargrove, 2003 Topps #264

So what's more disturbing: the fact that Mike Hargrove's jersey is clearly untucked, or the realization that we can't tell whether he's even wearing pants?

Baltimore Orioles, 2003 Topps #633

This is a weird card for a few reasons. Firstly, there's the fake outfield wall that Topps Photoshopped into the front of the picture. For some reason, they started doing this with team cards last decade; I guess they didn't get rights from the batboys' union or something and had to cover them up. But there's something else that I only noticed tonight. Look closely at the players and coaches. You'll probably have to click on the photo to enlarge it. Each and every person pictured is wearing sunglasses, and I'm guessing it was a conscious decision - some sort of goofy in-joke. Certainly many of the O's are grinning like they're in on something that you're not. They all appear to be the same type of shades, too. They gave me something to pay attention to and smile about on an otherwise ho-hum team card for a 95-loss club. I'll give them that.

Gary Matthews, Jr., 2003 Topps #509

With piles of snow still coating the entire state of Maryland, I've been intending to write about the one snowy Orioles game in my lifetime that I can remember. Fortunately, the Baltimore Sun recently made mention of it to jog my memory.

It was Opening Day - March 31, 2003 - at Oriole Park at Camden Yards. When the game started at 3:05 PM, it was 48 degrees and cloudy, but before long the temperature dropped and snow began to fall in the second inning. According to the Sun, the flurries became so heavy that hitters joked that they were aiming at the largest white blob, assuming it was the ball! In the third inning, the visiting Indians took the lead against starter Rodrigo Lopez on a routine Ellis Burks fly ball to right field. Burks couldn't even see the ball land; neither could O's right fielder Jay Gibbons. After that play, there was a 13-minute snow delay until the worst of the storm passed.

The Birds ended up battling back from a 4-1 deficit to force extra innings, with the help of a Marty Cordova two-run homer in the eighth. Gary Matthews, Jr. turned out to be the hero, reaching in the bottom of the twelfth on a single and scoring the tying run on a passed ball after Cleveland had taken the lead in the top of the inning. He thrilled the few thousand hearty fans that stayed until the end by delivering the game-winning single an inning later.

I have a vague recollection of having seen some of this game. I was a junior in college, and I had gone back to my friend Mike's dorm room with some of our other friends after dinner. As I recall, I was the only big Orioles fan in the group and I asked if I could change the channel to find out the score. It had to be somewhere near 6:30 at night, so I assumed the game would be over. I was surprised to see that the O's were still playing, and even more shocked to see replays of the earlier snow-related mishaps. I managed to catch the end of the game, and was thrilled to be able to celebrate a Baltimore win. Back in those heady days, the team was only working on a five-season streak of losing records, but I was still pessimistic about their chances. After all, they'd just concluded a 98-loss season in 2002 with a heinous 4-32 record down the stretch.

I'm choosing to remain optimistic that we're getting the winter weather out of the way early this year. If the white stuff is still falling at the end of next month, I might lose my mind.

Jorge Julio, 2003 Topps #538

For want of a night out, I spent a few hours this evening in the company of my sister and my future brother-in-law at the movies. It was my sister's choice, a fairly uninspired horror movie called Quarantine. While the film wasn't really any good, it certainly had some scares, particularly for someone as skittish as me. I was tense throughout, and eventually took to averting my eyes as much as I could, much as I did when I saw The Exorcist in the theatre during its re-release in my freshman year of college. That movie scarred me for quite a while; I can remember being legitimately relieved to have my roommate close by when the lights went out at night. I can't stay away from a good scare, often dipping into my sister's extensive personal library for a Stephen King novel or reading ghost stories online during slow times at work.

Speaking of things that go "bump" in the night, there have been few things more frightening to Oriole fans than the sight of ex-closer Jorge Julio lumbering in from the bullpen in the ninth inning of a tight game. Just seeing his picture, with that semi-blank look on his face, I'm certain that he's about to hang a slider to a Tampa Bay hitter. That's the kind of scare that I can do without.

Rick Helling, 2003 Topps #597

"Innings eater". Are there two dirtier words in all of baseball? Hey, it's great that you can throw a guy like Rick Helling or Steve Trachsel out there every fifth day for seven innings to give up four or five runs. But isn't it a little sad that this guy's defined role is "Hey, try not to suck too much, I want to give the bullpen some rest tonight"? Rick Helling sure thinks so. Look at the weary expression of resignation on his face. For good measure, Topps has included that same face from a slightly different angle in the inset photo. Rick hadn't even had a chance to toss up a career-worst 5.71 ERA in 24 starts for the O's yet, and he already had an impending sense of dread.

Buck up, Rick! It gets better! When the Orioles finally release you in August, you'll latch on to the Marlins' bullpen, allow one run in sixteen and one-third innings, and win a World Series for your troubles! (Of course, you'll pitch like crap in the postseason, but all's well that ends well, right?)